Conan the Destroyer is not just a movie. It’s a premonition.
At the very end of the film Princess Jehnna thanks Conan for saving her and offers him her hand in marriage but he declines. Standing there in a fur loin cloth, his muscles glinting with baby oil, he grinds out of his heavy accent “One day, I shall have my own kingdom, my own queen”.
24 years later he does have his own queen; Maria Shriver, princess of the Kennedy Dynasty and his own kingdom; California. Who’d have guessed?
Obviously the script writer.
Just look at the unlikely band of misfits Conan leads to victory; a Japanese mystic, an unshaven slacker who appears to have gotten his hands on some really good weed even while being, literally, on a different planet, a busty blonde seriously lacking in academics despite destined to be queen and Grace Jones. Is there any better analogy for the population of California?
Arnie, of course, is just one in a long line of American celebrities who have stepped into politics.
The most obvious is the monkey lovin’, pyjama wearing ex actor who went one step beyond ‘The Governator’ and became Teflon. Reagan managed to use his vast acting talent to stay in charge of a superpower for two terms and gave his name to a policy of economics that the country still pretty much stands by today. Good job! He was also about the only guy who was ever able to make our Prime Minister of the time look like a woman.
There are other’s of course; Clint Eastwood brought justice to the small town of Carmel as Mayor from 1986 to 1988 before he realised he’d get more done behind the camera and Jesse Ventura a former WWF wrestler who tired of acting in front of a baying crowd became Governor of Minnesota instead. Not much change there then.
Even one of my personal heroes, the majestic Hunter S. Thompson, ran for Sheriff of Pitkin County, Colorado although, of course, for him it was more about anarchy than the law.
In such a celebrity soaked culture, where most people’s immediate experience of the world comes through a screen, it is understandable that we want the people we see there to be in charge. It’s not that the British don’t also grow up on TV and film it’s just that all our screen stars are ugly. Of course our politicians are even uglier and hardly ever want to be seen on TV. If they could all just remain sequestered in the Houses of Parliament the aesthetics of the BBC would be greatly improved.
By contrast American politicians love being seen on television. It is their prime tool in message conveyance and they are experts in its use. From the first televised debate between a cool, good looking JFK and a sweating, nervy Richard Nixon it was clear the medium would shape the way elections were fought.
Indeed, recently it is not just celebrities becoming politicians but politicians becoming celebrities. The Clintons have replaced not only the Kennedys as America’s first family but also have more complex plot twists and alliances than The Sopranos. John McCain, once a media darling himself, now accuses Obama of playing to the ‘liberal’ newsrooms.
And then there’s Palin, whose outrage at press intrusion on her family was shown so succinctly by parading them during her speech at the Republican National Convention and having their images on the front of practically every magazine in high glossy colour for the next two weeks.
So the mantle of a media hungry political warrior with a dubious accent falls on fresh shoulders.
You know what the difference between a hockey mom and Xena the Warrior Princess is?
Guess.
2 comments:
Wasn't John Cleese an MP or something. If not, then it is our cousins across the pond to blame, not us Americans. He certainly has the look of an MP.
I always wondered what would happen if a really talented actor or actress ran for office. So far we have gotten mostly bad actors to run, Arnold, Ronnie, George Murphy, etc... Hmmm, also a lot of Republican Californians. But think of someone like Robert Redford in The Candidate. It's possible a really good actor could become even more trouble as a politician than a bad actor?
They are also less willing to take the pay cut, though Arnie seems to be enjoying himself.
This column is living up to its potential and actually going way over what I had hoped for.
The reference to the Conan movie shows great cleverness, memory (and/or research) and sets up much of the comedic tone that marks this whole piece.
Even though the column is laced with humor, it makes many sound observations, too.
"In such a celebrity soaked culture, where most people’s immediate experience of the world comes through a screen, it is understandable that we want the people we see there to be in charge."
Excellent observation.
But the columnist manages to make sure that she doesn't get us in too serious a mood, following up that paragraph above with this:
"It’s not that the British don’t also grow up on TV and film it’s just that all our screen stars are ugly."
It's lines like the above that have prompted me to avoid having any beverages in my mouth or throat when I read this columnist.
Very good ending, though I hope to quiz the writer to fill the class in on exactly what the answer is to the riddle.
Post a Comment